Imagine Being A Nobody

Saturday night, we had the pleasure of doing some moonlit cross country skiing and snowshoeing over at Wilton Wildlife Preserve. What a perfect evening! Old friends met us there and we were able to catch up and get some unique nighttime exercise. The other mom & I were snowshoeing along the candlelit trails and wandered upon the topic of adolescence ( we both have a few!). She told me about a recent comment she made to her son, regarding a new student who was struggling to integrate into his new school.
"Imagine if you were a nobody." Wow. That comment struck me right in my heart. Instantly I was transported back to those high school years when so much of what matters to you stems from the relationships with other kids. My mom friend was attempting to get her son to have some empathy for the boy and his challenges as a new student. It was a direct hit. Most teens do not want to be a nobody...they want to be somebody and will spend most of their energy trying to accomplish just that. There are a few who would rather hide under the radar screen, but most are busy sorting through the minefield of adolescent issues, attempting to become. Let's face it, that work continues well beyond the teen years. None of us really want to be a nobody. It was a powerful reminder of the mammoth developmental task that faces our children each day. Our job is to help them realize they are somebody special and guide them in getting to know themselves well, regardless of the clothes they wear, how popular they are or any of the other indicators that teens so often like to use. I will have to thank my friend for bringing me back so poignantly to my own teenage struggles to be someone.